Symptom777

Steve-O came round to help me set up the vortex generator. It's tricky, the generator is easily capable of destroying entire solar systems, so it requires fine tuning to use it to keep an area of 50 square meters clear of crows.

His head has healed nicely. Steve-O was not interested in purchasing a kitten for 500,000, he was interested in purchasing a three headed dog. Problem is, Cerberus is showing every sign of being immune, and huge too boot. This means I will need to keep him...

Pakman delivered the kitten. I paid him 4 BIG ones. Minutia has a puppy.

I now have a three headed dog and the most expensive kitten in the world.

Bollox.

Having sorted River out and relieved him of 900.000 I was able to venture back to Pakmans, collect my vortex generator and order the kitten. Pakman was extremely servile and, I noticed, had had his right hand transplanted. He was wearing just one glove.

Walking home, I bumped into Bitunova walking Rosey.

She said - Hi Symptom, want a shag?
I said - don't mind if I do.

We wnt up the alley and I took her fast from behind, it relieved the continuing...

This morning I was working in the garden, clearing the autumnal waste. Red was sitting on the fence hoping to pick up some grubs under the leaves. I was still thinking about Minutia's kitten, and Red wasn't helping.

He said - fuckkkkerrrr. Fuckkkkedddd. Fuckkkkerrrr. Fuckkkkedddd.
I said - shut it, Red.
He said - I'm just cawing. That's what crows do. Fuckkkkerrrr.

I was looking forward to getting my vortex generator. Although a vortex generator is...

Yesterday Minutia knocked on my door. I looked down at the top of her head. Minutia is even smaller than Minnie. Which is small. She is just like a 17 year old beauty queen, but then seen from a distance. She is about 60 cm tall, and about 45 of that is legs.

I said - hello Minutia.
She said - hello Symptom. I was wondering if you had seen my kitten, she disappeared a few days ago.

I had to listen very carefully because she has a tiny voice. I thought for a...