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  #1  
Old 05-29-2010, 10:03 AM
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TO MEME-A THRILLER THAT IM WRITING, DEDICATED TO YOU-TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

PART 1


Symptom777 would be dead in nineteen minutes.
And he had no idea why.

******************

The journey from Paddington to Hereford had been a long one, and the balding man in the brown leather jacket was exhausted. Luckily he’d asked that skinhead sitting opposite (The one in the T-Shirt with ‘Kevin Pietersons’s a comebag!” emblazoned on it) to wake him up when they’d arrived, or he’d have woken up in Worcester.
He hailed a taxi, and said “Bobblestock”, to the driver.
They set off, the driver completely oblivious to the fact that his passenger was in fact, one of the leading Biochemists in Asia….a man who was on first name terms with every atom on the planet.
A quarter of an hour later, they stopped, and the passenger got out. He began to walk away-without paying.
The driver turned livid.
“Oi, you fockin’ shite!” he roared, jumping out of the car and starting after the stranger.
“You cunt! I’m gonna have yer balls fer breakfast, mate!” He seized hold of the stranger’s collar.
It was the last mistake he would ever make in his life. The stranger whipped round at the speed of sound, the heel of his left hand thundering a powerful upward punch into the driver’s nose. The stupendous force of the blow rammed the bone right into the brain. It was the classic unarmed combat killing blow of the Mossad.
Symptom777 was dead before he slumped onto the ground.
Without a second glance at the still, silent figure crumpled at his feet, the most dangerous man since Peter Sutcliffe, and possible Dr Harold Shipman the Morphine slayer; the man known to the west only as Storyteller turned, and melted away into the darkness.

******************

Seventy three miles away, a girl called MEME VIRUS was kissing an eccentric named Imagine.
“Tell me you love again!” she cooed.
“/47/ &# )@~ */K*% $^%*%& @(/(3V ^:{}#” said Imagine.
“Aww..” said Meme, deeply touched.
Imagine kissed her hard again, accidently slobbering some slimy green saliva all over meme’s lips.
“EEWW!” squealed Meme, wiping her mouth on the back of her hand.
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  #2  
Old 05-29-2010, 10:21 AM
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COMING UP...PARTE 2!

Teaser Trailer of Part 2 -

"The camera flashes lit up Heathrow airport like a fireworks display.
Simon Corwell had just landed."


"...The card read, "Thank you. Come again.
By Mike Dubbeld's standards, that was emotion running amok."


"...but you said you were from Scotland Yard!"
"Scotland yard? I meant the yard outside. I was smoking a cigar there."


COMING UP...SOON!!!!
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  #3  
Old 05-29-2010, 11:03 AM
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Red face

lmao....

that created an earthquake...

hilarious....

symptom huh...

when did that fart knocker become a driver...

dead on the first day,what a dweeb...

no no no an arsewipe i smore like it....

thinking its cool to become a taxi driver ...

obviously for a poontang shanty bitch like symptom it must be like royalty...

man that guy just sucks...

his life and also sucks his his two inched dildo....
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  #4  
Old 05-29-2010, 11:25 AM
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rotfl!
ya..in fact, a summary of symptom would be - an arsewipish dweeb of the 'dildo' species.
according to meme, the poor sod also loves a good invigorating jog -in the nude- around westminister abbey every morning before breakfast.
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  #5  
Old 05-29-2010, 12:36 PM
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  #6  
Old 05-29-2010, 01:17 PM
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This student could not finish his composition so he runs down to the teacher and says, "Please let me do the composition. Please." The teacher said," Who do you think your talking too? You just said you had other things to do. I have other things to do and right now I am not thinking about your incomplete composition. Other students in here have other things to do and they still make time to finish their compositions but you do not do anything when the time is granted to you".

So the student decides to fight. He talks to his friends who claim," Oh, she's just having a bad day.Catch her on a good day when she doesn't have PMS or something and bring chocolates too". He goes buys a snickers bar and gives it to the teacher after a funny class where she laughed at some of her student's jokes. He asks again if he can complete the incomplete composition and she looks at him while he offers her the Snickers bar and everyone yells," oh isn't that sweet thepupil has a crush on the teacher". They leave calming down because somethings they know are better left unsaid." Now listen you, you know I do not accept bribes. What I said before still stands. Bye now I have work to do in the library."

The teacher tells him to ask the principal first and if she indicates that it is okay then he can rewrite his composition.

So, he goes to the principal so they can solve the problem together. The principal sees him and said, " You have more than one teacher complaining that you do not complete your work while in class. You always do the same thing expecting to get full credit for incomplete work. What are we going to do with you? She pauses and abruptly decides that he is going to have to settle his issues individually with his teachers because he is not follwing their instructions and must do so to graduate.



The student cries inside a little bit knowing he's wrong and to blow off steam and live up to his reputation for being a popular clown he runs down the hall yelling, "AAAAah watch out, watch out when you goto the office ready or not the principal is a Shiite in a mosque. THE PRINCIPAL IS A SHIITE, THE PRINCIPAL IS A SHIITE!




Then he sits and for the first time he eats lunch alone.

Last edited by Nef Raven; 05-29-2010 at 01:23 PM.
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  #7  
Old 05-29-2010, 01:38 PM
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The princibowl is a shiite.
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  #8  
Old 05-29-2010, 02:01 PM
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well, now, Meme, may we be honoured by your opinion of my latest work of literary genius?
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  #9  
Old 05-29-2010, 03:02 PM
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Pray enlighten me as to the disposition to whic your opinion is inclined.
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  #10  
Old 05-29-2010, 06:20 PM
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Goodness me! Poor Symp! I hope the hero goes on to solve problems in a more detective-like manner, like the strange and spooky problem of the chemical make-up of Imagine's green and slimy saliva. Could this lead to the discovery of new chemical elements hitherto unknown to science? Could this lead to some amazing new scientific discoveries? I eagerly await the next instalment of the thriller to find out.
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  #11  
Old 05-30-2010, 03:51 PM
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he already found an element....

what dont tell me you dont know...

well thats because its classified of course...

only two governments know about it....

which two countries you may ask...?

no way i am telling you...

but the thing is meme this metal was found on a hull of a pirat ship....

the ship of louis de grande....

the guy who invented the walk the plank technique...

this metal has rare properties...

which is also classified....

but then i am not sure that even story teller would just put it out at the risk of his life.....

it would be amazing if that happened
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All men fear...
The one who runs away from what he/she fears...
Is the coward...
The one who stays and fights his fears becomes the Hero...

this was how they faced the world alone...
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  #12  
Old 05-30-2010, 06:11 PM
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Aha! I believe I may have stealthily hunted the element down and tracked it to its origins among the pirates. I believe the key to the mystery may be a joke I found in the dusty archives of MI5's top-classified papers:

Quote:
What's a pirate's favourite element?
Arrrrrrrrgon.
I hope MI5 never find out I was there.

I tracked down the definition of argon to a secret dictionary floating on the edges of outer space. Here's the link that goes all the way into space to connect with it. It says argon is:

Quote:
A colorless, odorless, inert gaseous element constituting approximately one percent of Earth's atmosphere, from which it is commercially obtained by fractionation for use in electric light bulbs, fluorescent tubes, and radio vacuum tubes and as an inert gas shield in arc welding.
So this is the element the famed Storyteller discovered! Fantastic!
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  #13  
Old 06-01-2010, 09:22 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Meme Virus View Post
I found in the dusty archives of MI5's top-classified papers:
Oh, if the archives were dusty, you had probably called at the wrong address. The modern MI5 headquarters one is so High tech that the very particles of dust themselves are not dust at all, but mini atom bombs masquerading as dust to fool potential theives.

And Arrrgon wasnt really the element I discovered. You see, nowadays the colloquaism 'Arrrrrr' is not very fashionable among pirates. In fact, say "Arrrr' and you'd find yourself walking the plank.

You see, the problem with the "Arrrrr'' of the old days, was that it was a trifle vague. For example, let us assume that two pirates, whom we shall call pirate A and pirate B for simplicity, are conversing. "Oi've gart a load of ole queen lizzies' jewels stacket up in ma pocket, mate!" whispers A.

Now this is where you need to watch closely.

"Really? Arrrrrrrr!" whispers B, his eyes aglow in excitement.

Now any discerning person would instantly deduce, that by the employment of the colloquilasm 'Arrrr', B is attemting to express enthusasm. However, A, who failed his A Levels three times in a row, is no Miss Marple, and this confusing and mystifying expression leaves his head swimming. Result - fed up, he gives in his notice to captain Abercrombie, leaving the good ole' gang minus one trusty hearty.
Not the sort of thing one wants happening too often. Finally, after considerable pressure from pirates all over the world, the Old Bailey passed a law banning all 'Arrrrrs'.

You see now, meme ,why the Arrr is actually deadlier than the female.
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  #14  
Old 06-02-2010, 07:23 PM
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Aha, now I understand.

Well, if you can't tell me what element you discovered without risking life and limb, just tell me a bit about how you discovered it. I've been hearing some very strange things recently about the way scientists have discovered things. For instance, oxygen was discovered by someone performing the strange feat of mixing ... well I can't remember what they mixed now, but it was a bizarre thing to do. A bit like if I was to mix cheese with washing-up liquid to see what would happen.

So tell me about all the strange and tortuous processes you put the chemicals in your science laboratory through to discover the element you discovered.
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  #15  
Old 06-02-2010, 08:17 PM
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Aah, the old cheese and washing-up liquid experiment, eh?
Rereading, methinks ye was a we bit sarki, hmmm?
or perhaps, you actually had me figured all along,
you see

cheese and washing up liquid
is the secret ingredient in my invisibility machine
http://www.poseidons.net/invisibilit...-invisible.htm

did you ever realize that one of your spoons went missing?
yup,
it was cheese and washing up liquid that did, it.

Now you all are asking, "why is he giving away his secret?"
well i have not you see,

mentioned the TYPE of cheese, nor the BRAND of washing-up liquid,
so i guess you'll all be having fondoos every night for the next
few years until you figure it out.
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