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Old 06-04-2010, 07:19 PM
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Nef Raven Nef Raven is offline
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Roosters play Chicken

Great Scots MacBlog
Great Scots Magazine’s blog for the Scottish Terrier obsessed RSS FEED Roosters Playing Chicken

Apr 11th, 2010 by admin |

He went for me today. No real damage, but he had bad intentions.

It was only a matter of time, I suppose. He’s gone after just about everyone else. When Nathan was at Las Golondrians for three months after Charlotte’s death, Randy frequently jumped him. And recently, when my other son, Brian, fed the chickens evening and morning feedings Randy nailed him both times, once on his leg, the other time jumped onto Brian’s back as he bent over to fill the feed bin.

So a run-in with my ‘Chickenator’ was on the books I guess and Saturday the 10th we got down and dirty in the chicken pen.

I fancied myself the resident ‘St. Francis of the Chicken Yard.’ I convinced myself Randy was giving me special dispensation. Hearing stories from others of Randy’s assaults, stories of panic and bedlam inside the chicken pen, was actually entertaining, I have to admit. Especially when I was able to reply smugly, “Well, you know, he’s never jumped on me. I guess I imprinted early as care-giver, so Randy doesn’t flog the hand that feeds him!”

Imprint, schmimprint! Randy just whupped up on this ‘St Francis’ good!

About every third person I told of our acquisition of chickens back during my honeymoon days of Chicken Palace construction had at least one story about a mean as a snake rooster. Most of the rooster stories harked back to childhood and it was clear as I listened to the tales of bad-blood feuds that bad ass roosters leave life-long impressions, usually on one’s backside.

My run-in with Randy at afternoon feeding time surprised him I think as much as it did me. I just put the bowl of salad greens, corn kernels, tomato pieces, and old bread crumbs on the ground for “the girls” when I straightened up and turned around to see Randy with a demonic look in his unblinking eye and what may be difficult to imagine, but I swear, looked for all the world like an evil half-grin on his beak. And, boom. He launched at me puffed up four times his normal size, wings beating, beak biting, and his NBA-size chicken feet whirring like a buzz saw. He was not offering grace to St. Francis.

Fortunately for me and for everyone who loved the old Gong Show on 1970s TV– but unfortunate for Randy– I had in my hands the large, empty stainless steel bowl just picked up from the prior feeding which I managed to use effectively to perform a notable Chuck Barris ‘gong’ upside Randy’s head with a deft backhand. Eat your heart out, Chuck! Randy’s ‘chickenator’ performance was gonged before it scarcely got off the ground. I wasted no time heaping ample reinforcement: I grabbed the stick Nathan placed inside the pen for protection and Randy and I had a merry chase around the enclosure fence with me whacking him every time I got close enough to reach him, the rooster squawking like he was Sunday dinner, and “the girls,” heads down inside their feed bowl, eating away, showed all the interest of a Valley Girl’s “Whatever!”

I don’t know whether my seriously modified St. Francis approach will improve Randy’s disposition. I think it might. You see, that big stainless steel bowl he saw up close and personal is the size and shape of a stew pot. So I’m thinking old Randy has had a gonging premonition of things to come!

Joseph Harvill, publisher Great Scots Magazine
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  #2  
Old 06-10-2010, 04:16 PM
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Wheres the poll for me to vote on stuff?
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Old 06-11-2010, 07:00 AM
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Memnon Memnon is offline
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i think someone forgot where to post.....
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All men fear...
The one who runs away from what he/she fears...
Is the coward...
The one who stays and fights his fears becomes the Hero...

this was how they faced the world alone...
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